I am going to start wearing my hair this way…

Posted on May 3rd, 2013 Filed in: Life Tags: clueless about football, NY Jets

Posted on April 24th, 2013 Filed in: Life Tags: fillibuster, genius, parks and rec, we like to laugh

There is apparently a little ditty in the 7 Kingdoms called “The Bear and the Maiden Fair”. Its raucous little song where in a bear goes to fair, finds a lovely girl with honey in her hair and of course kidnaps her. Over the course of the song, Rapey The Bear manages to lick the honey out of her hair and she eventually relents and loves him or something…. MORE after the jump…

Posted on April 18th, 2013 Filed in: Entertainment Tags: game of thrones

Annnnnnnnnnnnnd we’re back. I decided to batch this up because not enough happened in either episode to merit its own recap. MORE after the jump…

Posted on April 12th, 2013 Filed in: Entertainment Tags: game of thrones, we like to watch

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What an injustice? Who would not want to roll to the smooth stylings of the Grand Imperial himself, Diamond Shell….Hit the high note Biz!

Posted on April 1st, 2013 Filed in: Life Tags: Office Dance Party

(1) Why is she so creeped out by James Franco but creeped out by creepy grandpa David Letterman?
(2) Does everyone scare her?
(3) Is it weird that she is super pretty but almost in a completely non-sexual way?
(4) What does it mean to be really Mexican? I can make mole…does that make me really Mexican?

Discuss…or not…

Posted on April 1st, 2013 Filed in: Life Tags: letterman, Selena Gomez, spring break

Posted on March 25th, 2013 Filed in: Life Tags: Office Dance Party

Several years ago, The Bump called me and we had a very long conversation about a new Shiri Appleby vehicle called “Charlie Wilson’s War”. You should have several reactions to this. First you probably are left wondering who exactly Shiri Appleby is. Once you google your way out of that conundrum, you’ll probably ask “Why do the Bump and xTian think a Tom Hanks/Julia Roberts movie written by Aaron Sorkin is a vehicle for a starlet no one has ever heard of?” MORE after the jump…

Posted on March 22nd, 2013 Filed in: Life Tags: clueless about women, girls, hbo, we like to watch

Wow! Between this and that Bloomberg thing I am going to draw one of the following conclusions.
(1) All mid-tier magazines are edited by blatant racists
(2) this Philly Magazine writer is really hates being white

Maybe you have a different take? Please share in the comments

Posted on March 19th, 2013 Filed in: Life Tags: magazines are doomed, publishing, racist

Awesome trailer for the new season. Spoiler alert – everyone gets screwed and/or dies

Posted on March 19th, 2013 Filed in: Life Tags: game of thrones, spoiler alerts

Apparently, the editor regrets publishing this. That’s cool I guess but how obtuse do you have to be to even publish in this in the first place?

I mean – someone somewhere was being malicious right? I am sure some 90% of the white people who let this slide thru were not malicious and just kinda oblivious but someone somewhere was being a massive d*ck…

Posted on March 6th, 2013 Filed in: Entertainment Tags: clueless, das racist, race

As a high flying marketing executive many of my meals come in the form of overpriced room service in snooty hotel chains. And while I love a good ribeye chicken caesar salad at 10:30PM as much as the next high flying marketing executive, one thing I don’t love is the room service tray. The instruction is always to leave the tray in the hallway when you are finished, which is easier said than done! These trays are designed to be held with 2 hands. Hotel doors are designed to be opened with 1 hand. That’s 3 hands. I don’t have 3 hands. So I end up standing next to the door with the tray balanced on 1 hand, wedged between my hip and the wall as I try to quickly (but not so quickly as to screw my balance up) open the door. Then I have to step into the hallway, sticking my back heel against the door so as to avoid locking myself out of my room. It’s harrowing. Harrowing. Someone should ideate a better way.

Posted on February 27th, 2013 Filed in: Life Tags:

Melissa McCarthy is a lovely woman. I thought so when she played Lauren Graham’s friend on Gilmore Girls a decade ago. Sure she is heavy but is also still pretty attractive. I thought Gilmore Girls used her well – introducing her as a “lesser friend” to a vivacious Lauren Graham but ultimately revealing her to be a more put together and generally happier person who managed to very quickly evolve into Lorelai’s equal and eventually someone who had her life way more figured out than poor Lorelai.

All this is background to say that I thought Bridesmaids was fucking gross and a terrible inflection point in McCarthy’s career. Sure she is making a ton of money today but she is also now a one trick pony – “hey, I’m fat. That’s funny”.

I mean – it’s true, sometimes…sort of…but it also bums people out if you keep going back to the well every week. As near as I can tell she has several movies coming out this winter/spring which can all be reduced to “Fat Girl is a Cop” or “Fat Girl is a Thief”. I know Hollywood is a mess but is this really all we have left in the holster to offer as entertainment?  This does not mean that Rex Reed is right and that we should make fun of her for being fat but how much of this is she bringing upon herself by making her body the core joke?

Let’s agree that no one should feel sorry for Melissa. Rex Reed is a dbag and desperately drawing attention to himself, begging to be relevant for 20 more minutes. She’s a working actress who figured she could ride this one joke to a series of paydays that could be worth 10s of millions of dollars to her and she needs to ride that train right up until the moment that the rest of America gets sick of their schtick as well.

Posted on February 15th, 2013 Filed in: Entertainment, Life Tags: body image issues, clueless about women, unhealthy relationship with food

Posted on February 14th, 2013 Filed in: Life Tags:

When people post photos of themselves doing fun things I’m all for it. Looks like fun! Good for you. I like doing fun things, and you like doing fun things, and that is why we are friends. Hooray!

BUT, when people post pictures of things that don’t look fun, my frown turns totally upside down. My rule in particular, is that if you post a photo of something that you otherwise would not have taken a photo of, you’re on thin ice.

So, here is the first in the series Facebook Status Photos That Make Me Barf. If you’d like to write my comment, in the comments section, I’d be happy to reply to this person’s ’status’ with your suggestion.

MORE after the jump…

Posted on February 12th, 2013 Filed in: Life Tags: